it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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