i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
