after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
