I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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