talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
