Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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