hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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