Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
