he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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