Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
