I am spending my child support on dildos
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize