Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Ladies don't puke and tell
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
