It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I understand Curling. That high.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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