we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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