that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize