Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize