omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
It was confusing and full of hummus
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I think I sprained my soul last night
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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