and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
