Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
