put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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