i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
