Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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