after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
