Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
