i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Randomize