yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize