I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
