Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
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