Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
