You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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