Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
accomplished twins. life is a go
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
