I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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