Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
