I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
