it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
