Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
