Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Floor bacon is actually really good
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
