Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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