she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
