You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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