it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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