While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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