In the future we'll all be gay
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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