I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
