The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
