you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Randomize
