i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
