dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
