people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I think a kid would responsible me up
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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