you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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