when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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