i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Boobs are out for the taking
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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